Helping you break free from the cycle of abuse

Virtual Coaching with Consider it Joy Life Coaching

Meet Morgan

Certified Life Coach Specializing in Narcissistic Abuse and Recovery

Welcome to Consider it Joy! I'm so glad you're here. I'm Morgan and I'm a certified life coach specializing in narcissistic abuse and recovery. No matter where you are at in your healing journey, my goal is to provide a safe place for you to process your emotions, build coping strategies, and develop healthy boundaries to promote healing and recovery.

Whether you need a one-time consultation, or to start progressing in your healing journey, I look forward to meeting you where you're at.

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What We Focus On

Understanding Narcissistic Abuse

Creating Boundaries and Healthy Relationships

Rebuilding Self-Worth and Confidence

Healing from Emotional Trauma

Personalized Recovery Plan

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"Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything." James 1:2

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"I am so grateful to have found Morgan. Her knowledge regarding narcissistic abuse is great, but it's her care, compassion, and ability to communicate things in a meaningful way that sets her apart."

- Sarah M.

"Morgan has helped so much with my healing journey. She provided hope when I didn't know where else to turn. She has helped me learn proper ways to communicate and set boundaries, and this has led to me being able to break free."

-Emily K.

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Narcissists and toxic people THRIVE on narcissistic supply. This is due to the fact that they are dependent on others to affirm their self esteem.

They may come across as arrogant, boastful, and overly confident, but this is in fact a mask to hide their extremely fragile ego.

Narcissistic supply comes from attention, respect, and admiration, and if the narcissist is not getting that from you, they will control and manipulate you in a way that ultimately gives them that supply in the end.

This is also the reason a narcissist seems to dehumanize you as their victim. You are simply an object to gain supply from.

If a narcissist can’t gain your affections through manipulation and flattery, they resort to narcissistic abuse. By belittling you, they are elevating themselves and their image. In other words, if you can’t be won over with praise, they will provoke. A negative reaction (you getting angry, upset, sad, argumentative) still serves as narcissistic supply.

So what can you do?

The Grey Rock Method.

The Grey Rock Method is a strategy in which you limit emotional reactions and engagement, when dealing with a toxic person.

The goal is to be uninteresting and unresponsive, until the toxic person loses interest, as they are gaining no supply from you.

This looks like
1. no contact when possible
2. short unemotional responses when absolutely necessary
3. Keep interactions short
4. Avoid arguing when provoked
5. Keep personal info private
6. Put more time between texts, or limit the time spent on the phone or in person

This may frustrate the narcissist, and they may escalate the situation at first, but stick to it, and eventually, the narcissist will seek supply elsewhere.

#narcissist #narcissism #toxicrelationships #emotionalabuse #traumabonding #narctok

1. Gaslighting

“I didn’t say that.” “You took it the wrong way.”

2. Invalidation

“You’re overreacting.” “You’re way too sensitive.” “There are way worse things that I could have done.” “I didn’t mean to hurt you.”

3. Blame Shifting

“You made me do this.” “It’s your fault that I react like this.”

4. Insults and Threats

“No one else would put up with you.” “You won’t find better than me.” “You deserve exactly how I treat you.” “If you leave, I’m going to hurt myself.”

5. Manipulative Words of Affirmation

“You’re all that I have.” “You’re the only one that truly understands me.” “You’re such a forgiving person.”

6. Isolation

“They aren’t a true friend.” “You shouldn’t hang around people like that.” “Your friends are annoying.”

All of these words and phrases are meant to manipulate you. The narcissist wants to keep you trapped, keep you from leaving, keep you isolated, keep you feeling worthless, keep you blaming yourself, and to keep you feeling completely responsible for their emotions.

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#narcissism #narcissist #toxicrelationships #emotionalabuse #traumabonding #narcrok

I know, I know…it sounds crazy, but this is all too common in narcissistic relationships

First, let’s talk about why narcissists often fake a crisis.

Usually, this is done for a few reasons.

1. To seek attention
2. To gain sympathy
3. To avoid responsibility

Narcissists crave the spotlight. They also have fairly low ethical standards, and are deceptive. Faking an emergency is yet another form of manipulation and deception. They will use their health crisis or other emergency to garner attention, encouragement, or sympathy from others.

This is also a way of maintaining control, as they are often attempting to get an emotional reaction out of you, or avoid accountability in some way.

Let me know in the comments if you’ve experienced a fake emergency by a narcissist, and what that looked like. I’ll go first ⬇️

#narcissist #narcissism #toxicrelationships #emotionalabuse #traumabonding #narctok

1. Denial

This usually happens once you come across information about what narcissistic abuse actually looks like, and it sounds all too familiar. You realize that what you’re hearing or reading has been your lived experience. However, even after the discovery, this information is so often ignored, and usually takes years to sink in.

2. Anger

After having time to process the information you’ve obtained, and seeing it play out first hand time and time again, you become angry. Angry that you were blind to the abuse before. Angry at the time and effort you wasted. And angry at the realization that you’ve been lied to, manipulated, and completely taken advantage of for so long.

3. Bargaining or “Doubt”

This is the stage where you begin to question your part in everything. “Maybe I’m the narcissist. Maybe they can change. Maybe they aren’t really a narcissist.” It is very normal for someone to doubt their reality after experiencing narcissistic abuse.

4. Depression

Once you finally acknowledge what you’ve been through, the pain and hurt can often be overwhelming, and send you into a deep fog. You’ve been completely stripped of your sense of self, and coming back from this often feels hopeless.

5. Acceptance

Acceptance looks different for everyone. This may happen when you decide to go no contact with the narcissist. It may happen once you’ve done the work to understand the trauma that you’ve endured. However it may look, acceptance is understanding that the abuse was not your fault, but also being able to recognize any unhealthy patterns in your behavior that need to change, in order to protect yourself in the future. You learn to set boundaries, heal your other relationships, and most of all, regain a sense of who you are. It’s accepting that healing is possible!

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#narcissist #narcissism #toxicrelationships #emotionalabuse #traumabonding #narctok

First and foremost, I want to note that just because someone isn’t a full blown narcissist, doesn’t mean that their actions aren’t abusive, or that you have to continue tolerating their abuse.

Keeping yourself safe from the harmful effects of abuse is crucial, and setting boundaries is always a good choice.

*Remember, someone who is truly remorseful is going to respect your boundaries.

So with that being said…what is the difference between someone with narcissistic traits, and a pathological narcissist?

Self Awareness.

A person with narcissistic traits has some form of self awareness. They can see that their abusive actions have caused harm. They can experience emotions such as guilt and remorse, and they can also take accountability, and experience growth.

A narcissist on the other hand, doesn’t have self awareness. Although they may pretend to at times, it is purely manipulative.

They may SAY they’re sorry. They may SAY they feel guilty for the things they’ve done. They may have “moments of clarity” as you are about to leave, but there is no TRUE remorse or self reflection.

Narcissism is a spectrum, and we all fall on it somewhere. Regardless, abusive people need to be held accountable for their actions.

There are those who exhibit narcissistic traits, who will seek out help and growth because they truly want to change, and then there are those who will pretend to do those things to further manipulate and abuse.

The key difference lies in if the person has self awareness or simply pretends to.

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#narcissism #narcissist #toxicrelationships #emotionalabuse #traumabonding #narctok

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Helping you break free from the cycle of abuse

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What We Focus On

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